WrestleMania 31 Fantasy Booking

With the Royal Rumble only a few weeks away, we are officially on the Road to the Road to WrestleMania. One of my favourite activities at this juncture in the wrestling calendar is fantasy booking my own version of the WrestleMania card. This doesn't necessarily reflect the matches that I think WWE will put on in three months, but the direction that I would take if I was in charge of their creative team. So here is how I would book the sports entertainment SuperBowl for 2015:

1. Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

With this newly introduced feature, WWE has found a clever way to give all the talent who don't find a place on the main card a chance to perform on wrestling's grandest stage, and pocket a small portion of wrestling's grandest payday. My winner this year? "It's me, it's me, it's BNB!"
Winner: Bad News Barrett

2. The Ascension vs. The Usos vs. Goldust/Stardust (WWE Tag Team Championships)

I envision the Battle Royal being on the pre-show, so this tag team championship match would be the hot opener to kick off the main WrestleMania card. I would put the titles on The Ascension early, maybe at the Rumble. Build them up as a vicious heel team and then have the fan favourites The Usos win the titles back at Mania. The Dust brothers are also in this match because they've taken a limited gimmick and got a tremendous amount of mileage out of it over the past year, so they deserve more than just a throwaway appearance on the card.
Winner: The Usos

3. Ryback vs. Cesaro

This is about re-establishing Cesaro as a beast - in my scenario, the Swiss Superman snaps when Ryback eliminates him from the Rumble. His rage finally unlocks his potential and he goes on a rampage in the midcard. For several consecutive weeks, he reaches Ryback's scheduled opponents before Ryback does and beats them up so badly that they can't compete. This is an implicit challenge to Ryback, which the Big Guy accepts eventually. The story of the feud is that Ryback takes him lightly at first, finds himself almost overmatched by Cesaro in the Mania match and manages to pull out the win in the end. This would be what JR would describe as a bowling-shoe-ugly brawl, filled with awesome displays of brute force. Both men would come out of the bout looking stronger.
Winner: Ryback

4. Dolph Ziggler vs. Rusev (US/IC Title Unification)

Ziggler and Rusev are being booked perfectly at the moment, touch wood. I would have both men retain their respective championships till Mania, setting up a highly anticipated Unification match. Ziggler picks up a classic underdog victory and a WrestleMania moment as he hoists both titles in the air
Winner: Dolph Ziggler

5. Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

This could be set up at Elimination Chamber, say when Orton eliminates Bray with an RKO, and the latter comes back to help eliminate Orton illegally. Orton snaps and goes into full Viper mode for the next month - the twist here will be that Orton chases Wyatt during this rivalry, not the other way around. The angle they can run with is that Bray Wyatt may have finally run up against someone crazier than himself. Dean Ambrose was mad in a similar over-the-top way, but Orton's repressed, lurking lunacy proves too much for Wyatt to handle and the feud could play up the fact that Wyatt fears an opponent for the first time. This way, when Wyatt gets the victory, both performers will have looked strong.
Winner: Bray Wyatt

6. Adrian Neville vs. Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens vs. Hideo Itami vs. Finn Balor vs. Tyler Breeze (NXT Championship Ladder Match)

Issue a "Warning: The Show is Highly Likely to be Stolen" disclaimer before the match, then just let them go out there and do their thing.
Winner: Sami Zayn

7. Divas Championship Invitational

This is the usual free-for-all match incorporating the Divas - maybe make it an elimination so they can get rid of the weaker wrestlers quickly. This unfortunately would be scheduled right after the inevitably scintillating NXT match to allow the crowd to catch their breath for a while. I envision Charlotte pulling out a surprise victory and marking her arrival on the main roster.
Winner: Charlotte

8. Sting vs. Triple H

This seems almost inevitable after the conclusion to Survivor Series. The storyline could say Sting stayed out of WWE for so many years because of the lies, the politics and the backstabbing - attributes personified by no one more obviously than Triple H. He finally returned because as the silent guardian of wrestling, he felt it was his duty to vanquish the man corrupting its soul, etc. etc. Although Triple H should ideally pick up the victory as the younger guy, I don't see any way to have Sting lose in his WWE debut at WrestleMania.
Winner: Sting

9. Roman Reigns vs. Sheamus

As I write this, Roman Reigns is probably still the favourite to win the 2015 Royal Rumble, but I don't think he is ready for a main event match just yet. However, a brawl against a heel Sheamus would be a perfect showcase for his still developing talents. Sheamus gives Reigns a beating like never before but Reigns wins with one devastating spear.
Winner: Roman Reigns


10. Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose (Money in the Bank Briefcase on the line)

This fantastic rivalry deserved better than the cheap blow-off it got at HIAC, and I would give it a fitting conclusion on the grandest stage. Maybe Rollins tries to cash in at the Elimination Chamber, and Ambrose comes out with his characteristic deranged grin to beat the hell out of him with a kendo stick. "I haven't forgotten about you, Seth!" Eventually, Ambrose somehow goads Rollins into putting the MITB briefcase on the line, maybe by promising to leave WWE if Rollins wins. Ambrose finally gets a deserved PPV victory here - they can always find another way to insert Rollins into the title picture.
Winner: Dean Ambrose

11. The Undertaker vs. John Cena

This would truly have been a dream match with the Streak intact, but it can still be done now. If Undertaker is going to have another match, I think Cena is his best potential opponent when you combine star power, potential match quality and a safe working style. The story would be that this is Undertaker's retirement match, and he is handpicking his final opponent. Taker can say there is only man in the current locker room who respects this business as much as he does and is worthy of carrying the torch, etc. etc. Make it an emotional angle along the lines of HBK vs. Flair, where Cena is reluctant to end Taker's career. Maybe Cena has a moment of hesitation while hitting the AA, allowing Taker to reverse into a Tombstone and get the pinfall. Of course both men embrace and are in tears after the match, and Taker gets a legendary send-off the next night.
Winner: The Undertaker

12. Daniel Bryan vs. Brock Lesnar (WWE World Heavyweight Championship)

Here it is, the oldest story in wrestling. Long before the pyrotechnics, the costumes and the razzle-dazzle, professional wrestling was about matches like these. Hero vs. villain, bully vs. underdog, David vs. Goliath. Here we have the ultimate David facing the ultimate Goliath. (Daniel vs. Goliath?) For this to work, Lesnar must be again built up as an ungodly brute to the extent possible. Demolish John Cena again at the Rumble. Eliminate all 5 men himself in the Elimination Chamber. Lay beating after beating on a still-recovering Daniel Bryan, who would of course be my Royal Rumble winner. And above all, keep the Creative Team far away from the feud and let Paul Heyman and his microphone work their incomparable magic. This one writes itself.
Winner: Daniel Bryan

So that, in summation, is my WrestleMania card. 12 matches may seem a lot, but over 4.5 hours that's about 22 minutes per match which is more than enough on average. May I please have a job now, Vince?

Finally

Prologue

Last November, I rashly bought a (rather expensive) ticket to Wrestlemania XXX , not knowing whether I would even be in America on the day in question: Sunday, April 6th 2014. As March drew to a close, I was still very much in Hyderabad, and it seemed as if the leap of faith was not going to pay off. Then, miraculously, I found myself staffed on a project that would take me to the US a mere week before Wrestlemania. It seemed like an act of providence, but it turned out to be an agonizing tease: a crucial meeting was scheduled for the day after Wrestlemania, and my presence became essential on the weekend. "The boyhood dream has slipped away!" I heard my inner Jim Ross lamenting.

I shook off the disappointment, and booked myself another (almost as expensive) ticket for the next pay-per-view: Extreme Rules in New Jersey. My project was coming along nicely, and apart from the awful Mania aberration, all my weekends had been free. I foresaw nothing that could stop me from finally achieving my decade-long dream. I could scarcely believe it when, just days before the event, a crucial meeting was scheduled for the day after Extreme Rules and my presence became essential on the weekend. Good ol' JR was going ballistic in my head. "Aw son of a bitch! It's too much! It's too much!"

Destiny was clearly a submission specialist, and every time my fingers seemed to be approaching the ropes, she was dragging me back to the center of the ring. "Ask him!" she was cackling. (Did You Know? Chris Jericho invented destiny) A lesser soul would have written off his losses and tapped out. But I was determined to get my Payback.

 Well, one month later, I did.

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Payback

If you want to understand what it is like to watch wrestling in the Allstate Arena in Chicago, picture a crowd with the old-school purism of Lord's and the fanaticism of Eden Gardens. This passion was evident even as I waited in line to enter the arena. It was a very hot evening, but that sold-out throng couldn't care less as they waited for the doors to open. Chants of "Whooooooo!" erupted every few minutes, because somebody (liar) had claimed to have seen Ric Flair enter the building. About 80% of the people were wearing wrestling merchandise, and this being a city that really knows its wrestling, obscure references and cheeky inside jokes abounded. "EAT. SLEEP. BANG SABLE. REPEAT." a tank top proclaimed.

I caught glimpses of wonderful madness. There was the father trying to bully his children into chanting "anything but Cena" while his wife looked on disapprovingly. There was a biker with a thick beard and dark glasses who was clearly choosing to live in a different era - he was sporting a Macho Man bandanna and a '90s Shawn Michael t-shirt. My favourite was a pregnant woman who had painted "Yes! Yes! Yes!" in fluorescent paint over her bare midriff.

I overheard snatches of conversation that made me chuckle. "The blood is fake," a teenager was telling his friends matter-of-factly. "I saw a video where Chris Jericho was given a capsule by the referee. It contains like artificial dye or something and they just bite on it and spit it out." The man in front of me began quivering with indignation on hearing this blasphemy, and started muttering furiously under his breath. His girfriend rubbed his shoulders anxiously to try and calm him down. Needless to say, I felt completely at home among this nutty group.

When we finally entered the building, I was taken aback by how much smaller it was than I had expected. I began to realize just how well WWE uses camera and lighting techniques to make the arena seem wider and taller than it really is. All of it works towards making the product seem larger than life for the television audience. Of course, that isn't to say the live experience is smaller in any way. Because its not the size of the arena that matters, it's the soul of the crowd, and oh, what a crowd it was.

I knew from the moment Sheamus walked out to a storm of boos that I was in for a special night. WWE crowds are becoming increasingly contrarian by cheering the heels (villains) and booing the babyfaces (heroes), but few do it with the wit and rabid intensity of the Chicago audience. 3MB, a comedy act whose sole function is to lose to everyone possible, received a hero's welcome. "SLATER'S GONNA SLATE YOU" one group sang to the tune of "JOE'S GONNA KILL YOU". On the other hand, Batista, who is leaving to promote his film 'Guardians of the Galaxy' (Yes, that one) soon was tormented by chants of "NAH NAH NAH NAH...NAH NAH NAH NAH...HEY HEY HEY GOODBYE!" later on in the night. It gave me chills to sit in that arena and be a part of that surreal sine wave of thunderous applause and vociferous jeers. 

I likened the Allstate Arena to Eden Gardens earlier. They also have a Sourav Ganguly here, and they screamed for him all night long. With clock-like regularity, the sacred incantation would emanate from 18,000 people: "CM PUNK! CM PUNK! CM PUNK!" The Second City Saint may have fallen from grace in the eyes of a lot of fans (myself included) after walking out of the company in the middle of his contract and severing all ties with the business, but in his home town, he can do no wrong. They didn't care that he wasn't in the building: they were going to chant his name. They probably would not have cared even if had admitted to serially murdering puppies.

To WWE's credit, they handled the Punk situation cleverly once again. Each time the chants gained momentum, they would play a video or advertisement on the screen to distract the audience. It is incredible how well that ploy worked. Stephanie McMahon and Paul Heyman masterfully used CM Punk against the crowd, and boy, did it annoy us!

There are some stark differences to watching wrestling live as compared to on television. The sight of two 200-pound-plus men slamming into each other at a high speed is something that takes on a completely different complexion when you see it in the flesh, as does the sight of steel steps flying into a man's shoulder. The sheer physicality of the art form is something that just doesn't translate well to the screen.

One thing the live experience does miss is the commentary. I didn't fully appreciate how valuable commentary was to wrestling until I watched an entire three-hour event without it. We tend to take the announcers for granted, but they perform an invaluable function by selling the viewers on the storylines. Without the crutch of commentary, the performers have to work very hard to keep the live audience invested in the action, which is a terribly difficult thing to do. How do you manipulate thousands of attention spans without speaking? This is where the elusive art of "psychology" comes in, and it is what sets the pros apart. The best example I observed was during a slightly dull period early on in the Evolution vs. Shield match. The crowd was growing dangerously quiet, bored by the lack of action. Triple H whipped Dean Ambrose into the corner, and I saw him whisper something into the latter's ear. Seconds later, Ambrose tagged in Roman Reigns, and the crowd came to life. I fancy I saw a tiny smile flicker across Triple H's face.

Then there are those who just don't need psychology. We hear a lot about the "It" factor, but it is hard to appreciate what it really means until you experience it in person. Some performers just have an intangible quality that can mesmerize thousands, and it is impossible to look anywhere else when they are in the ring. John Cena unquestionably has that quality, as does Bray Wyatt. All members of Evolution and Shield crackle with presence too. It is not surprising that the names I just mentioned are WWE's top stars.

Speaking of top stars, there is nothing about Daniel Bryan that would invite a second look, but when his entrance music hit, I almost thought a bomb had gone off. It is hardly believable how much people adore that man. Nearly every match on the card saw some dueling chants - "RVD" vs"BNB", "Let's Go Cena" vs "Cena Sucks", "Kofi Kingston" vs. "We Bolieve" etc. - but everyone was united in their love for Bryan. It is a remarkable phenomenon. 

Another person that merits special mention is John Cena. I don't think there is a wrestler who has a more genuine connection with his fanbase. Nearly every kid I saw was wearing a Cena t-shirt, headband or cap. You know he really represents something special to that age group when you see a young boy in a wheelchair proudly holding up a sign saying "Never Give Up".  I was seated next to a child of about 8, who was accompanied by his older brother. I noticed that the little boy was sitting unusually quietly throughout the show. He seemed to be waiting for something. When John Cena came to the ring, the joy on the child's face was something to behold. He jumped up and down, clapping, but he still didn't say a word. It was then that I caught sight of his brother saying something to him - in sign language.

(I must somewhat shamefully admit that all this didn't prevent me from fulfilling my duties as an adult male member of the WWE Universe - I shouted "Cena Sucks" at the top of my voice)

I realize now that I have nearly come to the end of my shapeless rhapsody without actually talking about any of the actual wrestling. Curiously, I find that I can remember very little of the matches. Moments stand out - Cesaro swinging Sheamus, Brie Bella (who looked divine in person) slapping Stephanie McMahon, Seth Rollins jumping fifteen feet off the screen to the ramp below. At home, I would have dissected each match with a critical eye, but I was savouring the live experience too much to really absorb it. To paraphrase Maya Angelou, I may have forgotten what they did, I may have forgotten what they said, but I will never forget how those performers and that crowd made me feel.

PS - My crowning moment was patting the Shield on their shoulders as they entered the arena from the crowd, but the blasted cameras cut away to the ring just at that very moment. However, a blurred image of me can be seen at least once during the telecast. That's me in the red circle below:

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Epilogue

I have now convinced myself that it could not have happened any other way. Wrestlemania is a climactic pilgrimage: WWE's season finale, as it were. I did not understand it then, but there was no way it could have been my first live wrestling event. The script does not work in that manner. Journeys culminate at Wrestlemania - they must begin elsewhere. Extreme Rules suffered from the opposite problem - it just didn't have a big enough sense of occasion. The wrestling gods knew that I deserved a grander stage to lose my wrestling virginity. What they wanted was to give me not just the show I needed, but the one I deserved - a Goldilocks event that was just right. A minor pay-per-view in a major city was the perfect setting.

So what happened when I booked my ticket for WWE Payback in Chicago? A project shutdown was suddenly announced for the week preceding the event, meaning I would essentially get one week off. There were to be no last-minute meetings this time. But the moment I really knew the gods had smiled on me was when I checked into my hotel the week before the show and was allotted this room:

Oh hell yeah.

The 10 Best WWE Entrance Themes

Winter has come and gone, and the Gorilla Post springs back to life with a guest blogger: Some of you may remember (I like to pretend I have a constant readership) the one and only Abhishek Sen, who has collaborated with me on this blog before (http://from-parts-unknown.blogspot.in/2012/01/new-years-special-12-suggestions-for.html). 

The Shillong City Saint is back for a special appearance, and today he will tell us about his favourite WWE entrance themes of all time. If you wonder why he is an authority on the subject, a look at his excellent music blog should convince you: http://scene-unsorted.blogspot.in/

Here, without further ado, is the man's list in his words, and in no particular order:

Hulk Hogan

The very first instance I can recollect of a gimmick in a song. Hogan's theme of 'Real American' resonated with the character he portrayed in the '80s. When he preached about saying your prayers and eating your vitamins, kids in Reagan's America believed him. And therein lay the influence of the song. It brought in massive mainstream appeal (see the promos of the first two Wrestlemanias) and made wrestling accessible to the 12-20 year demographic, something which was lacking before he came along.

Kurt Angle

Before there was hustle, loyalty and respect, there were the three I's—intelligence, integrity and intensity. It was about winning. It was about glory. And what better way to signify that than the powerful sounds of the trumpet? What's even better is that Angle's theme song allowed crowd participation with the famous "You Suck" chants. But Kurt Angle didn't suck. He went out and gave us some of the best wrestling matches we'll ever see. And when that victory came, he fell to his knees, the trumpets sounded - and it was glorious.

Stone Cold Steve Austin

*Glass Shatters* - Cue all hell breaking loose. The perfect set up for a superstar who defined the Attitude Era and this theme song sets the tone for the beer-drinking, McMahon-stunnering, mudhole-stomping, finger-waving, ass-whooper that he was. He said what he was going to do. He did it. And his theme song is the soundtrack to the chaos that many fans want to relive over and over again. 

Utimate Warrior

Warrior was, in one word, intense. That's the first thought that comes to mind when this theme song hits. The Ultimate Warrior would capture the electricity and excitement of this song by sprinting down the ramp and running around the ring, eventually climbing into it and shaking the ropes in a frenzy that can only be described as ultimate. Perhaps an exaggeration, but it's only fitting of his wildly random interviews. 

Chris Jericho

The countdown, the darkness, the explosions, and then the outstreched arms. I always loved him in WCW and it was a huge moment for the 12-year old me to see Chris Jericho make his debut in WWE. Another example of a wrestler's persona in a theme song. Also I always wondered why Jericho never used any of Fozzy's songs as his theme (even though TNA used 'Enemy' in one of their shite PPVs) and I realised he does not need to. His theme is so iconic, and tongue in cheek, that it says everything about the guy. Sample : "You can be my Judas. I'll be your Priest." (Judas Priest reference. Get it? *nudge nudge wink wink*)

D Generation X / New Age Outlaws

Even though these themes are not really that great from a musical standpoint, this was the very first instance of crowd involvement in the WWE. The crowds sang along, chanted and went completely bonkers when these themes played. Mind you this is before the age of Fandangoing, hashtags and viral marketing. The effectiveness of these themes resonate even in the PG era, as the crowds still go completey insane when either of the themes hit the PA. 

Edge

Everything about Edge screams excitement. I loved his old theme 'You think you know me', as it suited the antihero/vampire thing he had going on. I feel he came into his own as a complete singles wrestler after his heel turn and his self-anointment as the Rated R Superstar. The lyrics says everything that Edge's character was. He had paid his dues for 8 long years and finally he was taking what was his. By any means necessary. Metalingus indeed.

CM Punk

The voice of the voiceless has played an integral part in the rise of indie stars in the WWE. Bringing forward a hard-nosed work ethic and actual wrestling skills, the Second City Saint has been instrumental in changing what a 'wrestler' should be like in this generation. What sets him apart is his briliant choice in music (one of the many things we have in common, love of comic books being another one). Be it the cerebral-sounding 'Miseria Cante' from his ROH days, to 'This Fire Burns' by KSE to his current theme, CM Punk's themes say a lot about the person he is. Zero gimmicks. He is the Cult of Personality and it shows by his frequent 4th-wall breaching pipebombs, his Muay Thai inspired style and his rabid fans. Never to shy away from being a complete awesome dude that he is, the cherry on the cake was getting the notoriously media shy Living Color to actually perform the song for him this Wrestlemania. Says a lot about his drawing power  and, ironically, his popularity in the mainstream media.

Vince McMahon

El Heffe. The Boss. An interesting fact is that before his feud with Austin, he always walked out to the Raw theme. He changed his theme during the feud to 'No Chance' as a message to Austin that he apparently had no chance in regaining the smoking skull belt (which served as the WWE title back then). The very first instance I can remember where a theme song was in fact created to add an extra dimension to a character and add more color (for a lack of a better word) to the feud.  It was so effective that the theme has stuck with McMahon till this day regardless of whether he is playing a heel or a face.

The Undertaker

The ominous gong. You don't even have to be a wrestling fan to know that the The Phenom is coming and the end is nigh. The theme song alone adds to the aura of what the Deadman is and still sends a chill down the spine of seasoned wrestling fans. Even though he had kickass themes in his various avatars since making his debut in 1991, ranging from the brilliant 'You're Gonna Pay', to the cringe-worthy 'Rollin', it all pales in comparison to that extra dimension that this classic theme adds to his overall persona. The Demon of Death Valley indeed. 

Triple H

Motorhead. Nuff said.

Raw Review: 15th April 2013 - The Ryback Rises

Brief thoughts about each segment on the latest episode of Raw:

• Randy Orton/Sheamus defeat Big Show: It is unusual to see a heel booked on the wrong side of a handicap match, but JBL's commentary sold the story well. This was a good match to start off the show, but I am still wondering where this angle is heading since Sheamus looks set for a feud with Mark Henry. An Orton-Big Show singles rivalry would be a strange way to set up the heel turn that Randy Orton desperately needs. 6/10
• Brock Lesnar decimates 3MB and issues a challenge to Triple H: The execution of this angle was excellent. Lesnar can dish out a beating like nobody else, and Paul Heyman continues to be invaluable in selling ordinary storylines with his mic skills. However, while the segment itself was compelling, I am not among those looking forward to another Lesnar-Triple H match. With Lesnar working 3 to 4 matches a year, I'd rather see him in as many fresh rivalries as possible. 8/10
• Kofi Kingston defeats Antonio Cesaro for the US Championship: Good match, bad decision. I can't believe Kofi Kingston continues to be stuck in the cycle of winning and losing secondary championships, and I can't believe how much Antonio Cesaro's stock continues to fall on television. After repeatedly losing in non-title matches and being left off Wrestlemania, he has now lost his title in such throwaway fashion. I would like to believe that this will be the start of better things for both performers, but I have a feeling it would be too optimistic to do so. 7/10
• Jack Swagger interrupts title match, injures Del Rio: None of this is interesting me. Apart from the cash-in moment, Ziggler as champion has not felt special, and I am tired of Swagger's act. However, the Triple Threat they are building up to should be a good match. 5/10
• Team Hell No defeats Prime Time Players: The same old match. 4/10
• Ryback Explains His Heel Turn: I was surprised how good this was. WWE did a really nice job making it look like this feud has been brewing for months. Ryback's explanation was quite logical, and the video clips added credibility to his words. Full marks to Ryback as well for graduating from simplistic, catchphrase-oriented promos to something more meaningful. 8/10
• R-Truth defeats Wade Barrett: WWE really needs to come up with more creative ways of starting feuds for their secondary titles than having the champion lose non-title matches to new challengers. 4/10
• Teddy Long gives 'Bricky' the idea for Jack Swagger vs. Dolph Ziggler: The strangely interesting Booker-Teddy saga continues. Teddy, Vickie and Brad Maddox did a nice job in this segment. 7/10
• Team Rhodes Scholars defeat The Great Khali/Santino Marella: Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes must be feeling quite low at this time, having being shunted off Mania and having no visible creative direction. The match itself was standard stuff. 5/10
• Fandango Talks: This was WWE's attempt to maintain the momentum of 'Fandangoing' without turning Fandango into a babyface. I can see what they were going for on paper, but the segment just didn't translate well live. 5/10
• Jack Swagger defeats Dolph Ziggler: Dolph Ziggler continues to lose despite winning the title. I hope he is not booked as a Rey Mysterio-type of vulnerable world champion, although that's what the rumours say. 6/10
• Mark Henry steamrolls Sheamus during backstage interview: That's what Mark Henry does. 7/10
• CM Punk walks off: Even when Punk is taking time off, he does it in the most interesting manner. He deserves the break, and his return should be intriguing to say the least. 8/10
• Booker T continues to lose patience with Teddy Long: And I continue to be interested by this angle. 7/10
• Nikki Bella defeats Kaitlyn: The third champion to lose a non-title match on the same night? You must be joking. 4/10
• John Cena Calls Out Ryback, Gets Attacked by the Shield as Ryback Looks On: This was a very effective segment, although Cena did not logically refute any of Ryback's accusations. However, we got to see the serious and intense Cena, who is exponentially better than goofy Cena. Ryback has undeniable presence, and can get away with not speaking during a promo such as this. His walking away while the Shield pummeled Cena cemented his heel turn. I think he could be compelling as a monster heel, but it will be interesting to see how they handle the 'Feed Me More' chants. 7/10

Overall Rating: 6.12/10

Best Performers: 1) Ryback 2) John Cena 3) Kofi Kingston

Time to Break the Streak?

This is not about whether The Undertaker's 20-match Wrestlemania winning streak will be broken this Sunday by CM Punk, because it won't. WWE has all but extinguished any doubt about the result by making this rivalry an extended tribute to the recently deceased Paul Bearer. Punk has plumbed the depths of villainy to dishonour the memory of the Undertaker's former manager. Taker has fumed and seethed, but much to his frustration has not been able to give Punk the beating he deserves. There is no way this storyline doesn't end with the disrespectful villain getting his comeuppance at the hands of the furious legend. So this is not about whether Undertaker will lose to Punk - this is about whether he should.

Not since Randy Orton squared off against the Deadman eight Wrestlemanias ago has there been such a strong calling from hardcore fans to end the most famous streak in wrestling history. Since then, The Undertaker has faced Mark Henry, Batista and Edge on the grandest stage, and famously taken on Shawn Michaels and Triple H twice each. We knew Undertaker would win those matches, and accepted it without fuss. So what is different about Punk?

Professional wrestling works on a well-established model. Over time, a series of victories over increasingly high-profile opponents gives a wrestler credibility in the audience's eyes. When the wrestler has proven his ability to draw crowds, he becomes a star. He will be featured in main events where he will mostly win to protect his stardom. But after a while, he does not need victories because the audience has come to respect him for his tenure. He can now lose matches, and does so - usually to elevate new performers and build their credibility so they can be future stars. The cycle continues.

In such an environment, winning streaks are wasted opportunities. This is not a real sport. For example, it is of little use for a wrestler to win his retirement match and go out on top when he can lose and give someone the opportunity of bragging about ending his career. He can help make a star on his way out. Personal records have no meaning in pro wrestling.

And so, the greatest personal record is also the greatest opportunity. In his 22-year career in WWE, the Undertaker has won 20 matches at Wrestlemania, and lost none. It is an incredible figure that will probably never again be matched. "The Streak" is arguably WWE's best ever storyline and certainly its longest-running: It has played out over twenty years as one challenger after another have tried and failed to make a name for themselves by ending the Undertaker's dominance at Wrestlemania. But if the Undertaker retires with the Streak intact, who benefits from it? The Undertaker's legacy is already immortal, and is bigger than the Streak. His mystique is too massive to be diminished by one loss, even if it is the loss that ends his Streak. Won't WWE be squandering the chance to create a star for life? The person breaking the Streak would not only become a main eventer for the rest of his career and make WWE pots of money, he would probably instantly punch his ticket to the Hall of Fame.

But here's the tricky part. Whom can WWE rely on to shoulder the enormous responsibility of breaking the Streak? Veterans can be trusted, but they do not need the victory. Can the company ever put that much faith in any youngster? What if the audience rejects him? What if he decides to leave WWE for movies or mixed martial arts, as some who achieved early stardom have done? What if he makes poor personal choices and embarrasses the company? Ending the Streak is an enormous risk. Who can possibly be worth it?

If there is anyone, it just might be this man.

CM Punk is the most extraordinary talent to emerge in WWE in years. He calls himself "The Best in the World", and it is a very fair claim. He is definitely several miles ahead of anyone else in WWE at the moment. He is one of the very best in-ring performers in the world, and he is truly in a league of his own with the microphone. He will be remembered as one of the best talkers in history, maybe even the best. He is so brilliant with his acting that it doesn't even look like acting. He truly makes the audience believe that he means every word and gesture. In the 3-hour RAW episodes that abound with dull storylines, flat writing and one-dimensional characters, CM Punk is consistently the shining highlight. He is an artist who never disappoints.

Punk has long been an Internet darling, but after his famous "pipe-bomb" promo in 2011, he has caught fire with the larger WWE audience as well. When he was a babyface, he was cheered as much as John Cena, often more. He was the first person in a decade to beat Cena in merchandise sales - nobody had even come close for years. Now that he's a heel, nobody else gets nearly as much heat from the audience as he does. He can manipulate crowds at will. In short, CM Punk is over with the audience - he has established his credibility beyond doubt.

At 34, Punk is probably in the optimal phase of his career - he is neither too old to be considered the old guard, nor too young to be a rookie. He probably has 7 to 8 years of wrestling left in him, and that's a conservative estimate going by average career spans. And although CM Punk may be a rebel, he is a very good employee. He can be brash and outspoken, but with his clean lifestyle he will never be pulled over for drunk driving, suspended for drug abuse or found unconscious in a hotel room. He is not likely to be a liability to the company. If ever WWE had to bet on someone to beat the Streak and be able live up to it, they would have to bet on CM Punk.

But should WWE take this bet? The Undertaker's Streak was always a formidable thing, but it has taken on mythical proportions in the last four years with his awe-inspiring series of matches with Shawn Michaels and Triple H, which culminated in the spectacular Hell in a Cell encounter last year. CM Punk is many things, but he is not nearly as big a name as Michaels or Triple H. There is a very real possibility that a CM Punk victory would seem like an anticlimax to a story that probably peaked last year with the "End of an Era" match. This has been the best argument I have come across so far in favour of keeping the Streak alive. But I believe there is another, more important reason why the Streak shouldn't die - the Undertaker himself.

Many names are thrown around when the greatest WWE wrestlers of all time are discussed. Bruno Sammartino was WWF Champion for a total of around eight years. Hulk Hogan was the first to truly capture the imagination of a mass audience. Stone Cold Steve Austin was the hottest star at the hottest time in the industry's history. The Rock has achieved more crossover appeal than any other wrestler. The all-round abilities talents of Ric Flair, Randy Savage, Shawn Michaels, Bret Hart, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho and now CM Punk have seen them feature as regulars in the discussion.

I am a big fan of these great performers, but in my opinion nobody has come close to encapsulating what it means to be a professional wrestler more than the Undertaker.

Since his debut in 1990, the Undertaker has been a towering presence spanning multiple phases in wrestling- the colourful, over-the-top early 1990s, the Attitude Era that followed, the transition period in the early 2000s and the current PG Era - and he has been the one constant factor in all of them, without ever seeming anachronistic or out of date. He has portrayed two drastically different gimmicks - "The Deadman" and "The American Badass" with equal skill. He has won seven  world championships, seven tag team championships and a Royal Rumble. He has faced mat technicians, luchadors, high fliers and giants - and had great matches with them all. He moves with incredible speed and agility for a man standing 6 feet 10 inches tall and weighing 300 pounds. He has actually gotten better with age - wrestling one of the greatest Wrestlemania matches in history at the age of 47 last year. In addition to all this, he possesses unparalleled in-ring presence and definitely the best entrance in wrestling history.

But the Undertaker is not just a wrestler, he is a professional wrestler. This is one of the few men who stuck with WWE when Ted Turner's money was luring the biggest talent to rival company WCW in the 1990s. He is the only wrestler to have wrestled on the very 1st episode of Monday Night Raw (twenty years ago) to remain an active performer to this day. His contemporaries have retired (or been forced to), departed for other promotions or left to try their luck in Hollywood at other forms of entertainment. The Undertaker has been unwavering - a WWE wrestler through and through. He is renowned as a locker room leader, a rock for his peers to lean on and look up to during the ugliest moments in the company's history - the steroid trial in the 1990s, the Montreal Screwjob, the Chris Benoit tragedy. Stories of his physical toughness are legendary. To quote one - In the 2010 Elimination Chamber, his coat caught fire during his entrance. After dousing himself with water, he wrestled an intensely physical, 35-minute match with bad burns on his chest.

In his 23rd year with WWE, the Undertaker has not been associated with one single illicit affair, drug scandal, DUI arrest, bar brawl or backstage fight. He has never so much as given a controversial interview or taken a shot at a celebrity. He has as many incidences of unprofessional conduct on his record as he has losses at Wrestlemania - zero. Each of his peers has had at least some detractors - Ric Flair is crtiticized for his lifestyle, Shawn Michaels for his early drug problems, Bret Hart for taking himself too seriously, Steve Austin for his lack of longevity, and so on - The Undertaker is arguably the only wrestler in history to have commanded universal respect - from his employers, his peers and the fans.

I said earlier how the Streak would logically have to end given the traditions of professional wrestling, but the normal rules don't apply here. It's not that the Undertaker is bigger than wrestling, but he truly does encompass it. In a sense the Undertaker really is undefeated, because no other performer approaches his achievements. Just as Paul Bearer's urn symbolizes the Undertaker's soul, the Undertaker and his Streak have come to symbolize the soul of professional wrestling -unmarred by its creaking bones and scarred flesh. We fans spend the large part of our time complaining about all of wrestling's warts and moles - lackluster rosters, poorly written storylines, idiotic gimmicks or real-life controversies. But once a year, when that gong sounds, we are transported to the last surviving corner of purity in the industry, and we get to witness the very heights of what professional wrestling can be.

And so, the Streak must live on. Rest in peace, Punk.